Wednesday, 24 June 2009

Always Use the Green Cross Code



I know, I know, I haven't done my taggy things yet, I will, I promise...
It's just I've read some news that I feel rather passionately about.
Now, I've started to Twitter (in more ways than one I'm sure) and have noticed one or two rather raunchy types following me.
I couldn't understand why and then I clicked (no pun intended), I have the word 'party' in my profile.... besides wondering whether I'll be getting interesting party bag orders in the near future, it just shows how easily a few innocent phrases online can be misconstrued and potentially get you involved with people you'd really rather not.
May I say here and now ...I do not 'party'!! No more of the 3> messages please!

But, getting back to my point, teenagers follow trends and want to be liked and accepted and have tons of friends. Fitting in is what it's all about because if you don't, life can be hell. I have recently heard of a few cases of vile and persistant bullying and it can go beyond the playground. These teenagers are then going to seek some solace in finding friends elsewhere, ones they can talk to, be heard and understood..the internet.
Now I guess I'm breaking all my rules because I Blog, and this was mentioned when my teenager wanted to use social networking sites.
'Mum, you write to people you don't know...you go and meet them!! What's the difference?'
The difference is I have 27 years more experience, I have that gut feeling that wasn't there when I was younger, I'm a Mother and I see things in the world that frighten me and have to do what I think is right to keep my children safe (and hopefully get it right).
Thankfully her school has banned Bebo, and for my daughter real friends and writing a novel is her priority, but sadly I have seen some of her school mates Facebook pics and they just give the wrong impression. At 15 they want to have friends, look attractive and get their first boyfriend, they don't believe there are paedophiles on these sites.
Lets face it, when you were a teenager did you think you were so much more streetwise than your parents?

Contact lists on sites talk about ’friends’, but social networking sites stretch the traditional meaning of ‘friends’ to mean anyone with whom a user has an online connection. Therefore the term can include people who the user has never actually met or spoken to...and these are the exciting ones, and potentially the most dangerous.

I think teaching interent safety is as important as teaching your children to cross the road, have good manners and not speak to strangers.....

Here's some new research from McAfee, the internet security company, which surveyed 1,000 mums and dads across the UK about their approach to online safety for their kids.


The findings also highlight a clear call to action for parents to open up communications with their children about online safety and use:

· Only a fifth (19%) of parents regularly talk to their children about online safety and one parent in 10 has never raised the subject of security

· Almost half (46%) of parents aren’t aware that their children have any online profiles, and a third don’t think they use any form of online communication

· Yet reports show that this is not the case

TOP TIPS FOR PARENTS:

· Switch on security controls – Get to know what protection your anti-virus software or security suite provides. Activating parental controls and setting the right level of security is the first step you should take to create a safer surfing environment for your children.

· Careful PC placement – Put the family PC in a communal area (such as the living room or kitchen) with the screen facing the room as this will allow you to more easily see how your children use the Internet.

· Open up discussions and hold regular joint Internet sessions with your children - Being online is no different than being outside; you always want to know where your children are and become familiar with the places they visit. Ask your child about their online friends, in the same way as you would about their school and neighbourhood friends. Encourage your children to surf with you so that they can talk you through the different tools they use and their favourite websites. This will encourage a joint learning experience with the child teaching parents more about Internet tools and the parent offering the adult point of view.

· Actively educate yourself – Use the Internet to see what’s out there; join some social networks yourself (and perhaps add your children as friends) to see how the new tools work to better understand what the potential risks could be.

· Work as a team to set boundaries – Discuss with your child exactly what is safe and unsafe online behaviour regarding the kind of websites they visit, the social networks they use and the chat rooms they visit. Make sure you talk with children specifically about what is and is not appropriate behaviour online.

· Make sure your children understand basic rules for using social networks – They should guard their passwords and never post personally identifying information or inappropriate photos. Blogs and social networking sites offer privacy tools that can be turned on to restrict potentially dangerous users. The sites often automatically provide these protective tools to children under 15 years old. Children should share information only with people they know from the real world.

· Stanger Danger – Stress to your child that they need to tell you if they receive any odd or upsetting messages while chatting and that you will not be angry with them or ban the Internet as a result. Make it clear to the child that you understand that they cannot control what other people say to them.

· Recognise that cybercriminals don’t target a specific type of person – they are opportunists looking to take advantage and make money from all online users, regardless of age.

Thursday, 18 June 2009

Another Day another caterpillar



It's been a very long day..sigh.
I was woken by the teenager asking me to wash her socks, oh joy!
Darling Husband pulled the quilt off me, because I was annoying him looking so snuggled up and cosy...sigh.

I gave sock washing instructions which I discovered were followed to the letter...apart from the actual sock bit, they were no-where to be seen. You know sometimes I think I'm wasting my money on her education!

I dried the socks with the hairdryer, cooked scrambled eggs and baked beans, persuaded the younger two to get their uniforms on and took them up to the bus stop.
"Why do boys have willies, Mummy?" ...sigh...

Me: 'OOh, look, there's bus!'

I came in to the kitchen and made a cup of tea.
Read a ton of emails
Emptied the dishwasher and re-stacked it
Made a loaf of Bread
Fed 28 pigs and carried 10 buckets of water
Put the washing out
Filled the washing machine
Cooked sausages and peeled potatoes
Answered emails
Made Chelsea Buns and Danish Pastries
Put the washing out
Filled the washing machine
Found something for tea out the freezer
Answered emails
Put the washing out
Filled the washing machine (Isn't life terribly exciting some days?)

'Yes of course I can dispatch that today!' (heck I'm starting the school run in ten minutes!
I was terribly brave and followed instructions to go into Somerfield (OHMYGOD!!)and buy their bargain of the day Daz soap powder (we use a ton a day, I'm sure).
I paid a bill
Sent the enormous parcel
Collected teenager from posh school
Came home to find Darling Husband asleep on the sofa..grrr!
Put tea on to cook
worked on my NVQ
Put tea out
Uttered the immortal words..."Darling sit down and take your snorkel off at the table" (No, I'm not kidding)
Worked on my NVQ
Bathed the girls
Fed 28 Pigs and carried 10 buckets of water
Oh..I forgot to mention,
my new boots, did you know I have new Berghaus boots ?
Hmm, well, my lovely new boots were outside the back door where all boots should be.
I picked them up, shook them and bashed them delicately against the wall to loosen any dust or foreign objects that might have found their way in.
All dust out...
Foot in!
Squelch!
Gosh what's that green sticky stuff on my sock and more importantly in my new boot???
A very squished caterpillar...euck!!
Shudder!
yuck
yuckky
yuck...a very long day indeed.

Tuesday, 16 June 2009

Evolution of the Frog




So here at Frog Towers there have been some equipment updates and changes made in an attempt to cope with an increase in business, piglet population and hot weather.

So it's time to say goodbye to my purple wellies, it's just too hot for them so I have scrubbed them clean of 'organic matter' and put them neatly away until the Autumn.
My old purple walking boots have fallen to bits and so I thought I'd better have a good look for hiking shoes to take their place, not an easy task when you really do have feet like a frog (wider than they are long).
I must have the most awkward feet, really, I do....and... I suffer with all sorts of yuck foot-type ailments, so good shoes are very high on my list of priorities.
As usual, hurrah!! for the internet. three or four clicks and tada!! the postie Dude (as he affectionately called by the younger people in our house) delivers the very next day.

I am donning my few day old Berghaus Explorers perfectly suited to our rough terrain and occasional inclement weather (the only trouble is they're so comfortable I can't take them off). Darling Husband is asking if I shall be wearing them when I go to bed...he's just jealous!

I must say I was a tad concerned when Darling Husband read the info: " Berghaus boots
engineered from the inside out!...Ha! You'll never get the laces done up!"
But the laces are indeed on the outside and I managed them just fine!
They are not only perfectly grippy and comfortable walking across the 100 acres that is camp Frog, they are just lovely for wearing all day long, really light but really strong all at once..very clever.
.... useful for the speedy way I gracefully run to my executive storage facility and back to my desk.
...support in all the right places and no diggy-inny bits anywhere around my ankles.
Gosh I shall be the talk of the pig pen!
Oh how I shall walk to the school bus now...
....am I there yet?

Wednesday, 3 June 2009



It' been chaotic here, I know, I always say that, but so much has happened and time is whizzing by like a whizzy thing. We've had the Ball (more about that another time), I had lunch with Potty Mummy and Dulwich Mum....now why are people becoming obsessed with my footwear, Potty Mummy looked straight at my feet and said "Crikey I thought you had your wellies on there for a minute!"
Yes, hmm, Thanks for that. People, for the record, I do like colourful shoes.

Firstly, belatedly:
Thanks so much to Rebel Mother and Katherine for the lovely award, it's always a real boost to ones' ego and jolly nice to have some new artwork to display around the Blog!

Now just a few things today really, things that can only be heard or seen at camp frog (surely?).
Me: "Do you think the pigs would like this garlic?"
Teenager: "OHMYGOD!! Mum! You're so embarrassing!"

Me: "Darling Husband, have you ever seen your cowy-things licking a pig?"
Darling Husband (eyes rolling): "pfft...tut......OHMYGOD!!"
His eyes roamed to where I pointed, there next to the fence, on the lawn, was a very free range saddleback pig lying on it's side. Three or four bullocks had their heads shoved through the fence licking the pig all over his head, ears, nose and big fat tummy, and the pig was just loving it!

Neighbour on the phone: "Hello Mrs Frog, would you please tell Darling Husband that I have visitors in the field below the house (cattle), they arrived at 6.30 this morning. They roared down the lane, charged round and round the garden and cleared two fences before settling down to eat grass."

Me: " I'm so sorry, I'll send him over as soon as he's finished playing on his John Deere"

Neighbour on the phone: "Hello Mrs Frog, would you please tell Darling Husband that I have five more visitors in the field below the house (cattle).

Me: " I'm so sorry, he'll be over just as soon as he's finished playing on his John Deere"

Neighbour on the phone: "Hello Mrs Frog, would you please tell Darling Husband that actually the five extra visitors in the field below the house (cattle) are in fact mine, I didn't recognise them."

Me: "snigger"

Thursday, 14 May 2009

Men



I'm just trying to catch up on paperwork, missed emails and bills, having purely concentrated on orders being shipped. It's been an emotional time and we're still not functioning efficiently, so today when I opened an email I was mortified that I'd not kept a better eye on things.
The email was from a Senior Search Consultant and said:
"I took the liberty to do some research on your website, and uncovered some interesting points. This may interest you, since it appears that you are trying to gain new business through your website.

From my initial observations, your site is probably underperforming in the major search engines - Google, Yahoo, and MSN LiveSearch. When searching on a topic, most people don’t look past the first page of search results. I struggled to find you in the first couple of pages, meaning that you could be losing a significant amount of business."

Blimey! I've worked incredibly hard in the past optimising my website myself, using keywords, forging links and had got to page 1 of Google, and here I was taking my eye off the ball and losing my place - bugger!

Senior Search Consultant continued:
"...backlinks are low, Google Page rank..blah, blah.. right now your site has a Google Pagerank score of 2/10, which is probably one of the main reasons why your site isn’t showing up in the first page of the search results."

OHMYGOD!!

Senior Search Consultant continued:
"The final aspect I noticed about your site was page indexing. The more pages your site has indexed with unique keywords, the higher you will rank. Right now, your site has only 140 pages indexed by Google, which is quite low.
So to recap...blah, blah....."

and then he said:

"I’m going somewhere with all this... I wanted to do my homework and research your website because it’s my business. We are in the business of doing three things for your website:

1) Fixing all issues with your website

2) Ranking your site to the top of the search results, and

2) Blowing your online revenue off the charts.

What we do is simple: we correct every single issue with your website that effects how the search engines perceive you, then put you on the first page of search results in all the major search engines by working on your site month on month. It’s a no-nonsense approach that cuts through marketing fluff to the core of what gets a site to the top. We know what that is. We know how to do it. "

Well, I checked it out on Google, I know what that is, I know how to do it.
The I sent an email in reply, one that I think cut through the fluff and got to the core of the subject:

"Dear Senior Search Consultant,
Having just Googled:
Luxury Party Bags
Luxury Pre filled party bags
Cotton Party Bags
filled party bags,

I find I am still on page 1 of Google.
Kind regards
Frog.

I did get a read receipt but no congratulatory reply, ho hum!

Monday, 27 April 2009

The chap in the cape has visited again



We have lost Darling Husband's Mother.
She passed away in her sleep on Thursday night/Friday morning having gone out the evening before with friends to Bible study.
A friend sent a message...'it was a good death'.
We shall miss her in every way, a huge part of our lives, a big family in sorrow, shown by the fact we will need three funeral cars just to get our family to the church.
My children will miss their Grandma, miss making cakes and bread with her, miss raiding her tin of home-made shortbread when they came home from school.
Will shall miss many things and our lives will be very different from now on.

Monday, 20 April 2009

The Marvels of Gastronomy



The average Brit can cook ten dishes without resorting to the aid of a cookbook or online recipe - that’s the verdict of a new study into the nation’s culinary habits which suggests that many of us are more comfortable cooking foreign dishes than standard British classics when it comes to dining at home.

The “Great British Home-Cooked Menu Survey’ commissioned by UKTV Food, asked 3,000 respondents to reveal the staple dishes which they can prepare without the aid of a cookbook or online recipe.

The top ten dishes that Brits can make unaided:



1. Spaghetti Bolognese (65%)

2. Roast Dinner (54%)

3. Chilli Con Carne (42%)

4. Lasagne (41%)

5. Cottage or Shepherd’s Pie (38%)

6. Meat or Fish stir fry (38%)

7. Beef casserole (34%)

8. Macaroni Cheese (32%)

9. Toad in the hole (30%)

10. Meat, Fish or Vegetable curry (26%)

Well that's it then, I'm most certainly above average, I can make all those!
Jeepers, I must be a rocket scientist!
Can people really not cook these days?
Should I boast I can also make the following without the aid of a safety net or recipe?

Ice-Cubes - Darling Husband once berated me severely for buying such an item during Pimms weather and so I took it upon myself to become an expert in their preparation.

Toast - I even slice the bread myself!

Bread - ah, yes, all home-made in this house.

Tea - Glengettie, boiling water, a smattering of milk and sugar, et voila!

Scrambled egg - drop one box of eggs, sieve then whisk with a spot of milk, yum! (Serve on home-made bread made into toast)

Baked Beans - Get Darling Husband to open the can (it ruins one's nails!) and instruct daughter to stir slowly over a medium heat.

Cheese and Crackers - perfection with a nice Shiraz.

Pimms! How could I forget the Pimms! - slice the cucumber, strawberries, forage for fresh mint, pour in tall glass and top up with cold lemonade - scrumptious!

Boiled Eggs - oh I do a perfect boiled egg, with the aid of a timer even, gosh how clever!

Cupcakes - weight the eggs, add the same weight of flour and sugar and butter...instruct 5 year old to stand with the electric mixer for some time while I file my nails then whack in the oven in gorgeous paper cases, easy peasy!

So that's another ten and I haven't even begun to tell you the culinary classics I can conjour up!
Cheese on toast..
popcorn...
fresh fruit salad....

The increased culinary confidence is also reflected in the fact that men and women would now appear to be on almost equal terms when it comes to home cooking – women can make 11 dishes unaided, compared with men who can make nine, representing a seismic shift in the traditional male/female roles over the course of a generation.
Hmmm....

http://uktv.co.uk/food/homepage/sid/6136